# @ryanalexh on Instagram

- **Type:** Video
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DGmJ92KStnF
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/28747922-ryanalexh-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/84374b437f.jpg
- **Posted:** 2025-02-28T00:22:26.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Ryan Alexander Holmes (何仁安) (@ryanalexh) — https://gondola.cc/ryanalexh

## Caption

tough love is often a form of emotional neglect or abuse, disguised as care. 
In bell hook’s book All About Love: New Visions, she emphasizes that love and abuse cannot coexist, and that true love requires care, respect, and responsibility—rather than harsh discipline or control.
She also discussed how tough love is frequently used in Black families as a response to systemic oppression, where parents believe they must be extra strict to prepare their children for a harsh world. However, she critiqued this approach, arguing that it often perpetuates cycles of trauma rather than fostering real emotional resilience.
#masculinity #beaman

## Stats

- **Views:** 0
- **Likes:** 13,256
- **Shares:** 0
- **Comments:** 279

## Tags

masculinity, beaman

---
Copyright (c) Gondola