# @kendalltoole on Instagram

- **Type:** Video
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/Cl2E43Fp91k
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/33807840-kendalltoole-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/781af0a37c.jpg
- **Posted:** 2022-12-06T23:44:26.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Kendall Toole (@kendalltoole) — https://gondola.cc/kendalltoole

## Caption

✨ hold tight you’re slowly coming back to life…✨

It’s my first time back to El Salvador in 3 years and this time, even more than ever, it brought me back. The landscape, the incredible people, the spirit of this country I love so much… there’s such a currency of gratitude that fills the air, the clear-clean water, the black sand beaches and the sheer kindness of the people. I love the whole fam @puro_surf and it was incredibly special to take my Dad along to get back on a board for the first time in decades so we could have a fun adventure to log in the books! So much love for all of you @chiki_surf @bautisansot @the_pink_panther14 @marcelocsurf 

🦋My soul needed this…here’s why: 

Full transparency: my mental health has been declining for a few months. This just some of what happens with depression/ anxiety— seasons or even years in this case, where you think you “beat” it and that you can ease off of the tools and self-talk and habits that you relied on through the tougher chapters…and BAM… it knocks you down again and feels like you are back to square one (not the truth but surely the feeling). This isn’t the first time I’ve delt with it and it surely won’t be the last but what has changed is through therapy, the support of my friends and family, my faith, and learning to surrender and accept this is part of who I am and the shadow side of the superpower it can be… you learn to live WITH it. It’s the heavy backpack that I will always need to wear and in these seasons you just have take a “seat”, catch your breath and go back to basics. 

For me, the basics look like this. Finding the lessons in the water, feeling the connection to being present and being surrounded and grateful for the love that is there even when there are parts of my fearful brain that says otherwise. 

Keep going through the setback seasons…because even when it feels like your falling behind, maybe it’s just because you needed to stop and take in just how far you’ve come. 💚✨🦋⚡️

#elsalvador #mentalhealthawareness #elzonte #surfcity #elsalvador🇸🇻

## Stats

- **Views:** 208,086
- **Likes:** 16,448
- **Shares:** 0
- **Comments:** 373

## Tags

mentalhealthawareness, elsalvador, elzonte, surfcity

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