# @raisingculturesfamily on Instagram

- **Type:** Image
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/CGtzAuBB4uI
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/38144563-raisingculturesfamily-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/a1934f5cf5.jpg
- **Posted:** 2020-10-24T06:05:24.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Keia Jones Baldwin (@raisingculturesfamily) — https://gondola.cc/raisingculturesfamily

## Caption

Sometimes I hate that our "smart" phones or social media "remind" us through a picture or status of what was going on in our lives "last year, 2 years, 5 years ago etc." ...I just got a notification on my phone that said I had memories from years ago...

As I clicked to see, it kindly reminded me that it was the last time I was pregnant and it ended it miscarriage. I'd taken a picture of the postive test...because it was always "this is going to be it this time!"...just for it "not to be it this time"...I stored all of those related pictures in a precious file in the "cloud" and somehow I must have missed that one. 

As I was scrolling through the rest of the memories they "just had to share" with me, my countenance then was definitely full of sorrow and bitterness. All of my smiles were forced and I could see the hurt in my eyes. 

Yes, I've suffered through several losses...and there's not one that I went through I'll ever forget. I felt like my angel babies would be upset with me if I moved on when they didn't...so I dug deeper into my grief...but God! I had to stop blaming myself, my womb, and my body for not doing what I felt it was "supposed" to do, bring forth life...I had to lay it all down, and let it all go! 

I gave myself permission to heal, permission to move forward, permission to let go, permission to live! So thank you for the "reminder"...even though I didn't need reminding. 

I'm stronger because I gave myself permission to be the best mother to my living children while still sending mommy kisses to heaven 🥰
❤💛🧡💚💜💙
#rainbowbaby #adoption  #love #healing #forgiving #permission #transracialadoption #motherhood #Miscarriage #ivfjourney #advocate #fostermom

## Stats

- **Views:** 0
- **Likes:** 1,279
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- **Comments:** 27

## Tags

ivfjourney, miscarriage, adoption, motherhood, love, rainbowbaby, fostermom, forgiving, transracialadoption, permission, advocate, healing

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