# @jpaulnadeau on Instagram

- **Type:** Video
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DJbzhhevfJw
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/59787483-jpaulnadeau-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/80d47254ee.jpg
- **Posted:** 2025-05-09T13:27:10.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Paul Nadeau (@jpaulnadeau) — https://gondola.cc/jpaulnadeau

## Caption

"Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood."

These words from Stephen Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People changed everything for me—not just as a hostage negotiator and professional interviewer, but as a human being.

In high-stakes moments—whether standing across from an armed suspect, sitting across from an interrogation subject, or navigating a heated conversation with a loved one—the most powerful tool was never always my voice. It was my listening just as much.

Real connection begins when we pause our own agenda. When we stop rehearsing our reply and instead ask, “Help me understand…”—and mean it. When we listen to learn, not to react.

People don’t care what you know until they know you care.

In hostage situations, understanding de-escalates faster than demands.
In interviews, truth comes when defenses drop.
In life, conflicts persist when we’re waiting to speak instead of striving to hear.

So next time you’re in a tough conversation, try this:
Pause. Ask. Listen.

The moment someone feels understood, walls turn into bridges.

Where could this habit transform your conversations?

Drop a 💬 below if this resonates—or tag someone who really listens.

#ListenFirst #CommunicationSkills #The7Habits #NegotiationMindset

## Stats

- **Views:** 66
- **Likes:** 20
- **Shares:** 0
- **Comments:** 1

## Tags

the7habits, communicationskills, listenfirst, negotiationmindset

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