# @dr.san__ on Instagram

- **Type:** Image
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DSxG0ChjB8E
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/63505560-drsan-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/58201fb969.jpg
- **Posted:** 2025-12-27T12:42:07.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** San Choudhury (@dr.san__) — https://gondola.cc/dr.san__

## Caption

As 2025 comes to an end, I’ve been reflecting a lot on the year that followed the completion of my PhD.

Tbf, I’ve done a fair share of that reflection while I was co-writing a piece titled ‘The Year of the Scholar’ for The Scholarly Letter (link in bio). It really gave me a way to take stock of how my thinking, values, and sense of self have shifted over the past year.

Finishing a PhD brings a particular kind of freedom. When I was doing my PhD, my life had been structured by clear milestones, predefined goals, and a sense of predictability. But when that structure disappeared after I finished earlier this year, the openness I encountered was far from liberating. If anything, it was disorienting. I think it was especially so because I knew I didn’t want to remain in academia in its conventional form but still felt very committed to research and scholarly work.

If you’ve followed me since earlier this year, you may have sensed that uncertainty. I was having a major identity crisis (thanks for putting up with my emosh posts back then :’)). It was definitely more than just a career question. I stayed awake hours for the first few months trying to answer the question: how to remain in relation to scholarship without being defined by institutional pathways? 

But as the year progressed, I saw the beginnings of answering that question. Not definitively, and certainly not neatly but perhaps enough to begin articulating how I now work, think, and stand alongside academia.

I’m still at the start of this journey. These roles are practices I am growing into. There is much more learning, maturation, and recalibration ahead. But this year has already given me a footing, and I’m very much looking forward to sharing what is to come publicly here.

#scholar #writer #academia #paraacademia

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## Tags

scholar, paraacademia, academia, writer

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