# @juleswaller_ on Instagram

- **Type:** Image
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DaRbvsBmliX
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/67458410-juleswaller-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/945004b193.jpg
- **Posted:** 2026-07-02T01:40:28.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Julie Waller (Jules) | School Refusal Support (@juleswaller_) — https://gondola.cc/juleswaller_

## Caption

The thing nobody tells you about school refusal mornings is that the words almost don’t matter.

What matters - before anything else - is what your nervous system is doing when you walk through that door. 

A rushed, tense, braced parent delivers threat signals regardless of what they actually say. 

A regulated parent delivers safety before they’ve opened their mouth.

I know this because I got it wrong for a long time. 

I had scripts. 
I had strategies. 
I’d lie awake rehearsing what I’d say. 

And I’d walk in tense, braced, already dreading it - and she felt all of that before I’d opened my mouth.

The morning I finally understood that my nervous system had to come first - not hers, mine - everything started to shift. 

Not overnight. 
But that was the turning point.

She missed over 100 days of school that year. 
She also successfully graduated with her first-choice university.

I’ve written out the exact morning sequences and what-to-say guidance in the toolkit - so you’re not trying to remember any of this at 7am when your own alarm is going.

- Jules ♥️

#schoolrefusal #schoolanxiety #teenanxiety #kidsanxiety #teenmentalhealth

## Stats

- **Views:** 0
- **Likes:** 267
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- **Comments:** 446

## Tags

schoolrefusal, schoolanxiety, teenmentalhealth, kidsanxiety, teenanxiety

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