# @juleswaller_ on Instagram

- **Type:** Image
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DbffP11E_CU
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/68602669-juleswaller-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/c6c3cb106d.jpg
- **Posted:** 2026-08-01T09:11:50.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Julie Waller (Jules) | School Refusal Support (@juleswaller_) — https://gondola.cc/juleswaller_

## Caption

The most surprising thing parents tell me after using the toolkit isn’t about mornings getting easier. 

It’s realising what “fine at school” was actually costing their child.

Every report I ever got said the same thing. 
“She’s fine”. “No concerns”. “A good day”.

I believed it for longer than I want to admit, because it’s what I was told by the people watching her all day. What no one saw was the work behind it. 

From the outside she looked calm, and it never looked like something teachers would flag, because the version of her that showed up at school was the version she’d built to get through, not the version underneath it.

She was masking so hard to hold that “fine” together that by the time she got home, there was nothing left.

Eventually the “fine” caught up with everyone, and she could no longer push through. The result was over 100 days of school missed in one year alone.

She’s at uni now. 
Her first choice. 

Not because she got better at pushing through. Because we finally understood what “fine” was actually costing her, and worked with her body instead of asking it to keep performing.

If teachers keep telling you your child is fine, and your child falls apart the moment they’re home with you, that’s not a contradiction. 

That’s the mask coming off in the only place it’s safe to.

Comment TOOLKIT and I’ll send you where to start.

💛 Jules - university mental health trained, and a mum who’s lived it. 650+ families and counting.

#schoolrefusal #schoolanxiety #teenmentalhealth #kidsmentalhealth #teenanxiety

## Stats

- **Views:** 0
- **Likes:** 13
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- **Comments:** 2

## Tags

schoolrefusal, schoolanxiety, teenmentalhealth, teenanxiety, kidsmentalhealth

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