# @poosh on Instagram

- **Type:** Image
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DbosICnh8xu
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/68857251-poosh-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/f6104edd93.jpg
- **Posted:** 2026-08-04T22:58:19.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Poosh (@poosh) — https://gondola.cc/poosh

## Caption

Dating advice usually focuses on what to do next: wait to text, play it cool, give it three dates.

However, relationship expert and author of UNSINGLE missamychan suggests you consider what’s fueling your attraction in the first place.

Instant chemistry can feel convincing. Anxiety, inconsistency, and mixed signals can often create a powerful pull (and not always to the right person). A healthier connection may feel less dramatic at first and more like ease, curiosity, and consistency.

Here’s what dating smarter looks like in action:
✨ The Question. Ask yourself, “How do I feel around this person?”
✨ The Type Audit. Look for the emotional pattern your past relationships have in common.
✨ The Compatibility Test. Prioritize shared values and life goals more than shared playlists.
✨ The Chemistry Check. Stop confusing anxiety with chemistry. Inconsistency can feel exciting but it may actually be familiar dysfunction.
✨ The Readiness Check. Assess your capacity and availability to nurture a relationship.
✨ The Behavior Read. Look for consistency, communication, and follow-through as signs of a healthy connection.
✨ The Bottleneck. Notice where you keep getting stuck, then focus your energy there.

Read the full article for Amy’s guide to dating smarter at link in bio. #poosh

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## Tags

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