# @drlauraberman on Instagram

- **Type:** Image
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DckKEEok4OR
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/69886578-drlauraberman-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/9f39662fe8.jpg
- **Posted:** 2026-08-28T01:14:20.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Laura Berman (@drlauraberman) — https://gondola.cc/drlauraberman

## Caption

I say this to people in my practice all the time:

If you want to truly love and be loved, you have to be willing to get your heart broken.

I know that sounds scary. 

I don’t mean that the person you love is necessarily going to leave you or betray you. I mean there are no guarantees when we love another human being.

People disappoint us. Relationships change. And sometimes, through death or other kinds of loss, we lose people we would give anything to keep.

Heartbreak, in one form or another, is part of loving.

And so many of us spend our lives trying to protect ourselves from it without realizing what that protection is costing us.

I understand why.

Our hearts remember what hurt us. What we saw growing up, what we didn’t get, who left, who betrayed us, who we lost, and all the times love didn’t feel safe.

But I don’t believe we’re here to keep our hearts intact. 

I believe love is one of the great classrooms of the soul, and so much becomes possible when we stop making the love in front of us pay for the pain behind us.

Of course, your heart should be earned. Boundaries matter. Discernment matters. Pay attention to who someone shows you they are.

But when love has earned your trust, the question becomes: Am I protecting myself from this person, or am I protecting myself from love?

Because real safety isn’t a guarantee that your heart will never break. None of us gets that guarantee.

It’s knowing that if it does, you will find your way through. And somehow, even after heartbreak and even after profound loss, the heart has this extraordinary capacity to grow around what happened and love even more.

And in the meantime, you get to love. Fully ♥️

I went much deeper into this in today’s Substack. Read it at the link in my bio 🔗

#relationships #loveandrelationships #emotionalhealing #drlauraberman

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## Tags

relationships, emotionalhealing, loveandrelationships, drlauraberman

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