# @sheisfila on Instagram

- **Type:** Video
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DdKiqZOD-HU
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/70308660-sheisfila-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/13a082d651.jpg
- **Posted:** 2026-09-11T23:00:03.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Fila McMillan-Antwine (@sheisfila) — https://gondola.cc/sheisfila

## Caption

Every pattern has a purpose. Even the ones you don't like. 🔁

This is something that's going to be so transformational for you to accept: the parts of your relationship history, the behaviors you're not proud of — they're there for a reason.

There's a reason your love identity came to be. And it's not all bad. It's not all negative.

You created this pattern as a mechanism of safety. As a barrier for yourself. You're simply recognizing now that it's no longer aligned with the partnership you actually want.

Take overgiving, for example. It creates connection. It creates a sense of being needed — which fosters your sense of value.

You became an over-nurturer because it met a need for you. There was a point in your life where you discovered: I can be valued. I can connect with people. By giving more than they gave me. By showing up more than they showed up for me.

In that moment, it served a purpose. It fed a need. It filled a void.

The desire to be needed creates security.

Once you understand this, you stop shaming yourself for the pattern — and you start honoring the little girl who created it to keep herself safe. 👑

🔖 Save this — you'll want to come back to it.

#SacredQueen #LovePatternReset #Overgiving #NeedToBeNeeded #InnerChildHealing #AttachmentStyles #HealingJourney #SelfAwareness #RelationshipCoach #EmotionalHealing #WomenHealing

## Stats

- **Views:** 222
- **Likes:** 3
- **Shares:** 0
- **Comments:** 0

## Tags

sacredqueen, relationshipcoach, innerchildhealing, womenhealing, needtobeneeded, lovepatternreset, selfawareness, attachmentstyles, emotionalhealing, overgiving, healingjourney

---
Copyright (c) Gondola