# @un_filtered_wisdom on Instagram

- **Type:** Video
- **Original URL:** https://www.instagram.com/p/Dei4EifBE9O
- **Gondola URL:** https://gondola.cc/posts/71694811-un-filtered-wisdom-instagram
- **Thumbnail:** https://img.gondola.cc/tr:w-,h-,fo-auto/postThumbnails/12877a48c8.jpg
- **Posted:** 2026-10-16T06:21:41.000+00:00
- **Account Owner:** Rhaab Grien (@un_filtered_wisdom) — https://gondola.cc/un_filtered_wisdom

## Caption

You know what happens when you put someone on a pedestal?

You turn yourself into a fan and them into a celebrity.

And celebrities don't date their fans just because their fans bought all the merchandise.

Look at this guy.

He's asking a porn star for her number, and she's giving him the diplomatic equivalent of a restraining order.

She's flattered by his attention, but that doesn't mean she wants his attention.

And this is where people get it wrong.

They confuse being desired with being desirable.

They confuse being someone's favorite person with being someone they're attracted to.

And they confuse getting someone's attention with having a genuine connection.

When you put someone on a pedestal, you're basically handing them a crown and asking them to judge your worth.

You've made them the prize before you've even figured out whether they're worth winning.

You don't know their character.
You don't know their values.
You don't know whether they'd make a good partner.

But they're attractive, so suddenly they're royalty.

And you're standing in the courtyard, hoping the king or queen will throw you a scrap of affection.

Here's the problem.

People can enjoy being worshipped without having any desire to worship you back.

Your attention feeds their ego.

Your admiration makes them feel desirable.

But none of that means they're attracted to you.

You can be someone's favorite source of validation and still be their last choice for a partner.

Read that again.

Stop auditioning for people who haven't even passed your interview.

Stop confusing attraction with compatibility.

And stop treating someone else's beauty like it's evidence of your own inferiority.

You can admire the painting without crawling into the frame and asking it to love you back.

Find someone you can stand beside, not someone you have to kneel before.

Because the moment you put someone above you, you stop asking whether they're right for you and start begging them to decide whether you're good enough for them.

And that's how you turn attraction into worship and dating into a religion.

Stop looking for gods.

Start looking for partners.

#DatingAdvice #Attraction #Relationships #Self

## Stats

- **Views:** 4,151
- **Likes:** 42
- **Shares:** 0
- **Comments:** 7

## Tags

relationships, datingadvice, self, attraction

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