i found myself going through all of my old tiktoks only to realize that those videos are now of a person that doesn't exist anymore. my smiles, my laughs, even my tears don't feel the same as they did in these past documented clips. through the rollercoaster of emotions and constant random waves of grief, i've found myself spiraling trying to be this girl again until i came across a video that explained this harsh truth. But in this harsh truth it's important to understand that this is a gateway to rebuilding a stronger and completely new version of yourself when you're ready. if you're also experiencing grief for the first time, just know there is no right or wrong way to handle it, grief is too messy & overall way too complicated to figure out. the weight only gets heavier and it's only going to get more complicated if you try and force yourself to go back to normal, because it'll never be "back to normal". be patient with yourself and let the hurt HURT. start rebuilding when YOU'RE ...