It’s taken me a bit to sort through some of my emotions about nationals, but I wanted to share this before going to 4CC. This nationals was about more than placements & medals. I have never skated with such joy & love for this sport as I did last week. I came into this competition knowing that making the team was a long shot; I also knew that I wanted to go out and skate for the version of myself that couldn’t four years ago. Being an elite athlete my whole life & then being faced with the reality that I might never be able to skate again made me reject everything about skating & my athleticism. Maybe it was irrational, but it was how I coped with the death of my dream. Months went by in a blur. And when I finally healed & decided to try again, the universe rubbed its hands together & said, “Let’s see just how much she can take.” Going through more injuries, more embarrassment; the resulting crippling self-doubt, anger, sadness, & sometimes just staring at the ceiling wanting to walk ...