A letter To the place where I let my self hate thrive It was never the gym I hated. Oh no It was how I used it to punish myself. The me I hated Now that was toxic I told myself it was about “health,” but really I just wanted to fix parts of me that I thought were wrong. I looked in the mirror and saw something that needed to change — a body part to shrink, to tone, to “perfect.” Because that’s what we were taught… “body goals.” Then I found powerlifting. I thought, finally — something empowering. But even there, I was trying to prove something. Prove that the “big girl” could be strong. Three hours a day, chasing strength but still comparing myself to everyone around me. Even with the medals, I never felt good enough. And I always wondered — why does the thing that’s supposed to make me feel good actually make me feel the lowest? So I stopped. I cut it all out. I let myself rebuild from love, not hate. Now, when I move my body, it’s because I want to — not because I need to prove a...