🏔️ "Just a few more steps." BRUUUUH. 🐾 We were lied to. Professionally. With eye contact and confidence and the specific tone of someone who has said "just a few more steps" seventeen times today and means it less each time and knows it and keeps saying it anyway. 😐 Step one was fine. Steps two through four hundred were not steps. Steps two through four hundred were a negotiation with gravity that gravity was winning and red panda was losing and the view at the top better be the single greatest view in the history of human civilisation or someone is filing a complaint. 🎋 The guide said flat. The guide's definition of flat and the dictionary's definition of flat are two completely different documents. The guide has never read the dictionary. The guide will never read the dictionary. The guide is already ten metres ahead pointing at something and saying "almost there" which is what the guide said forty minutes ago. 😤 Almost died is not an exaggeration. Almost died is a conservat...