why were the only options overworking or shame? I used to feel like constantly thinking ahead, considering every possible outcome, and trying to stay 5 steps ahead in 10 different directions was just me being prepared. but I’ve realized how much of that was really just me struggling to relax because my mind was so used to expecting stress, tension, disappointment, conflict, or for something to go wrong. I became the person overworking myself, constantly anticipating everybody’s wants, needs, reactions, responsibilities, and all the possibilities trying to stay ahead in every way because I felt lazy and guilty for anything less. it’s like I learned that my worth was measured by how much I can do so I made it my job to stay on top of everything and “save” everyone but eventually I burn myself out and my body finds a way to force me to rest whether I want to or not. but even then, I can’t really relax because my mind starts telling me I’m falling behind, everything’s gonna pile up, ...