With fragrant smoke wafting down Pennsylvania Avenue as a line of administration officials and VIPs stretched around the block, sources reported Saturday that leadership at the U.S. Department of the Interior had begun grilling up the nation’s last remaining endangered species. “Whooping crane’s served!” said an apron-clad Interior Secretary Doug Burgum, who manned multiple grills on the new patio in the White House Rose Garden and was seen struggling to flip the vanishing bird’s three-foot-long wings with a set of tongs. “Hoo boy, that’s looking good. Get ’em while you still can, people! I’m about to throw some woodland caribou on there, too. Oh, and the jaguars! You won’t find these anywhere else in the whole country. Just tell me how you want yours cooked. You know how it is—some folks like their jaguar well-done, others like it still roaring.” “Ah shoot, that was the last one of those,” Burgum added as he fumbled a juicy thigh from the world’s only remaining Laysan duck and it fe...