When it comes to buying a cell phone, prisoners have different priorities to those on the outside. While you might be concerned with memory, or screen resolution, or how many cameras they’ve managed to squeeze on the back, inmates have one main thing in mind: whether it will fit neatly inside somebody’s asshole.⁠ ⁠ Handsets like this are marketed on Amazon as being 100% plastic, i.e. non-metal detectable, and reviews include, "No anal problems!!! Didn't hurt my bum at all thanks guys :)"⁠ ⁠ "Phones are everywhere [inside]," says former inmate Carl Cattermole. "Staff bring them in, or you could buy one from another inmate by doing them a favor or giving them something. People normally use them in their cell, but it gets to the point where they just use them in the gym changing rooms like it's the outside world."⁠ ⁠ Not too long ago, the butthole of a guy being admitted to HMP Manchester in the UK was found to contain four mobiles, four SIM cards and four chargers. Then there's the Brazi...